You Must Be At Least This Skinny To Eat This Taco

DUDE. Proposed by a Republican, (in the Mississippi state house) no less:

Lawmakers have proposed legislation that forbids restaurants and food establishments from serving food to anyone who is obese (as defined by the State). Under this bill, food establishments are to be monitored for compliance under the State Department of Health and violators will have their business permits revoked.

Wow, there's a Huckabee Republican if I've ever heard one. He was even interviewed by blogger Sandy Szwarc, who runs the fascinating Junkfood Science Blog:

I called lead author, Rep. Mayhall, and asked if this was serious legislation or tongue-in-cheek to make a point. He kindly took a moment to answer my question while the legislature was in session. He said that while, regrettably, he doesn’t believe his bill will pass, this is serious. He wrote it, he said, because of the “urgency of the obesity crisis and need for government action.” He hopes it will “call attention to the serious problem of obesity and what it is costing the Medicare system.”

Oh. you've succeeded in calling attention to something, Rep. Mayhall. You've succeeded in calling attention to the boundless excesses of the bloated nanny state who deny people the simple pleasure of a nice meal out. I can see it now...

MAN: Hey, it's our third date and I thought we'd try this place--it's one of my favorites.
WOMAN: It looks great, and I'm so pleased you brought me here. I'll start with the minestrone, please.
WAITER: Certainly, madam...would you first mind stepping on this scale, please, thank you...hmmm....close, but, no, sorry, NO SOUP FOR YOU, Lardus Maximus! Waddle your enormous butt out of my restaurant, you belt-busting sack of repulsive cholesterol, and try not to get stuck in the doorway if you can help it. Nibble some alfalfa sprouts at home alone in silent shame, tubbs, and try not to be such a gobby-fat disgusting mess before you presume to show your multiply-chinned moon-face in polite society again.
MAN: Hey, I'll call you later, honey. Hmm, I guess I'll have the porterhouse, medium.

Big Nanny is already upon us. Chew each bite twenty times, or you lose your government-mandated health insurance.

H/T to the Watcher's Council blog, who were kind enough to nominate my intemperate grunt below for a major award.

MORE: I really do believe this beats what Patterico's co-blogger WLS calls his "Nominee for the dumbest legislative proposal so far in 2008".